Boom Boom

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Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2791
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Wed Aug 12, 2020 7:45 pm

I sat next to an insurance salesmen at a Robbie Williams concert.

And through it all, he offered me protection...

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2791
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Wed Aug 12, 2020 7:46 pm

I used to get so excited about French lessons.

Sometimes a little 'oui' would come out.

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2791
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Wed Aug 12, 2020 7:46 pm

I taught my Dog to play the trumpet on the London Underground.

We went from Barking to Tooting in about an hour.

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2791
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Wed Aug 12, 2020 9:26 pm

I tried to change my bank password
to "BeefStew" ....

but it said it wasn't stroganoff.

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2791
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Wed Aug 12, 2020 9:26 pm

I've just been informed that a distant relative has left me a priceless watch in his will .

I hope it's not a wind up !

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2791
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Wed Aug 12, 2020 9:27 pm

My new dog, Minton, just ate all my shuttlecocks.

Bad Minton !!

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2791
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Thu Aug 13, 2020 9:33 am

My wife and I often laugh about how competitive we are......

But I laugh more.

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2791
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Thu Aug 13, 2020 9:34 am

I spent all week erecting a new fence in my garden.
My neighbour commented on my Facebook page that it wasn't straight so I unfriended him.

That's the last time he comments on my posts!

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2791
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Thu Aug 13, 2020 9:34 am

My wife told me over breakfast this morning that she's leaving me because of my obsession with Twitter.

I was so shocked I nearly choked on my #brown

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2791
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Thu Aug 13, 2020 9:35 am

How do you make a Pirate angry?

Take the 'P' out of him.

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2791
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Thu Aug 13, 2020 9:35 am

I've just been on Trip Advisor. They recommend LSD and magic mushrooms.

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2791
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Thu Aug 13, 2020 9:36 am

My mates obsessed with The Beatles, he has every single they've ever released, except for one.

I think he needs help!!

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2791
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Thu Aug 13, 2020 9:37 am

My favourite teacher at school was Mrs Turtle.

Strange name but she tortoise well!

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2791
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Thu Aug 13, 2020 10:58 am

Teacher :- If you have £10 and ask your Mum for another £10 how much have you got ?
Me :- £10.
Teacher:- you don’t know your Maths.
Me :- you don’t know my Mum.

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2791
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Thu Aug 13, 2020 11:00 am

Sadly the days of people using proper English are went.


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