Boom Boom

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Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2666
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Tue Sep 22, 2020 7:07 pm

I asked Sinead O’Connor which evergreen conifer tree she would recommend.

She said nothing compares to yew...

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2666
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Tue Sep 22, 2020 7:12 pm

How do you give up in a towel throwing contest?

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2666
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Wed Sep 23, 2020 7:29 am

I've designed a plane made entirely from rubber, so that when it crashes it will bounce.

It's a Boing 747

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2666
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Wed Sep 23, 2020 7:33 am

My friend shocked and hurt me. He told me today that I make people very uncomfortable and have no respect for personal space. I mean, what a thing to say to a friend. It totally ruined our bath!

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2666
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Wed Sep 23, 2020 7:35 am

Did you know that a piranha can devour a small child down to the bone in less than 30 seconds?

Anyways, I lost my job at the aquarium today...

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2666
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Wed Sep 23, 2020 7:35 am

My wife bet that I couldn't guess how many items were in our kitchen utensil drawer.
I said 25, it turned out to be 26
I was a Whisker away.

80fc
Posts: 189
Joined: Thu May 17, 2007 12:20 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by 80fc » Wed Sep 23, 2020 8:20 am

I got a decorator in to do some work. I got chatting to him and it turns out he's a BA pilot who's been furloughed and doing a bit on the side for some extra cash. He's made a lovely job of the landing.

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2666
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Wed Sep 23, 2020 10:16 pm

Every Friday night I used to visit a local Argentinian/Indian fusion restaurant. It gets too rowdy these days and I don't like the argy bargy.

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2666
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Wed Sep 23, 2020 10:18 pm

My boss said to me, "This is the fifth time this week that you've come to work late. Do you know what that means?"

"Yes," I replied, "it's Friday."

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2666
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Wed Sep 23, 2020 10:19 pm

I've just looked in the classified section of the paper and there were three anger management classes!
Must be all the rage !

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2666
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Wed Sep 23, 2020 10:21 pm

I threw a cream tea at my wife....I've never seen her so angry.

Hell hath no fury like a woman sconed

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2666
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Wed Sep 23, 2020 10:21 pm

I'll never understand why I lost in the first round of the Skrabel championship !!

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2666
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Wed Sep 23, 2020 10:24 pm

Went to my local fish & chip shop and asked the woman behind the counter for a bag of chips.
She said "Do you want anything on them?" I said "Does it cost any extra?" she said "No"
"Ok I'll have a pie and 3 sausages!"

steveshot
Posts: 284
Joined: Sun Apr 01, 2007 9:41 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by steveshot » Wed Sep 23, 2020 10:25 pm

Have you been locked in your mancage without a tele, radio, phone 😂😂🙈

Anon E Mouse
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Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Thu Sep 24, 2020 7:13 am

steveshot wrote:
Wed Sep 23, 2020 10:25 pm
Have you been locked in your mancage without a tele, radio, phone 😂😂🙈
:lol: Feels like it.


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