Boom Boom

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WTF
Posts: 699
Joined: Sat Nov 03, 2018 9:17 am
Re: Boom Boom

Post by WTF » Fri Feb 12, 2021 10:37 am

I'm having the locks changed at home so i thought I'd write a song about it, there's a key change at the end.

Fuggletim
Posts: 591
Joined: Sat Jan 18, 2014 11:16 pm
Location: Whitehill
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Fuggletim » Fri Feb 12, 2021 12:56 pm

I decided to leave work early today as it's Friday! Not sure why the passengers on my plane got so freaked out when I put my parachute on!

Richard Petty
Posts: 625
Joined: Wed Jan 10, 2007 11:12 pm
Location: Farnborough
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Richard Petty » Sat Feb 13, 2021 12:18 pm

Its just been announced that Cher is joining the Spice Girls, she is going to be called "Old Spice"

Richard Petty
Posts: 625
Joined: Wed Jan 10, 2007 11:12 pm
Location: Farnborough
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Richard Petty » Sat Feb 13, 2021 12:29 pm

A friend of mine recently had his credit card stolen, he hasn't reported it though as the thief is spending less on it than his wife did

Fuggletim
Posts: 591
Joined: Sat Jan 18, 2014 11:16 pm
Location: Whitehill
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Fuggletim » Sat Feb 13, 2021 12:32 pm

Reports are coming in of a Black Forest Gateaux, a Raspberry Pavlova and a Blackcurrant Cheesecake on the rampage in Aldershot. Police say not to worry as the streets are desserted........

Old Bob
Posts: 568
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 3:23 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Old Bob » Sat Feb 13, 2021 1:08 pm

Richard Petty wrote:
Sat Feb 13, 2021 12:18 pm
Its just been announced that Cher is joining the Spice Girls, she is going to be called "Old Spice"
I'd rather have (C)her than any of the others :lol:

Shots1954
Posts: 751
Joined: Wed Aug 09, 2017 6:31 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Shots1954 » Sat Feb 13, 2021 5:50 pm

Old Bob wrote:
Wed Feb 10, 2021 9:52 pm
Shots1954 wrote:
Tue Feb 09, 2021 10:21 am
What do you call a man who can’t stand? Neil.
That was the first joke I ever heard, when I was aged about 6!
👍

Richard Petty
Posts: 625
Joined: Wed Jan 10, 2007 11:12 pm
Location: Farnborough
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Richard Petty » Sat Feb 13, 2021 6:04 pm

What do you call an apology written in dots and dashes ?

Re-Morse code.

Richard Petty
Posts: 625
Joined: Wed Jan 10, 2007 11:12 pm
Location: Farnborough
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Richard Petty » Sat Feb 13, 2021 6:10 pm

Years ago I used to supply Filofaxes for the mafia. I was involved in very organised crime.

Fuggletim
Posts: 591
Joined: Sat Jan 18, 2014 11:16 pm
Location: Whitehill
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Fuggletim » Sat Feb 13, 2021 6:19 pm

An empty beer bottle walks into a bar and says to the barman "Fill me up with your strongest ale please?"

The barman refuses and says "Sorry you are clearly drunk already!"

Dr Jim Royle
Posts: 739
Joined: Mon Sep 12, 2011 6:21 am
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Dr Jim Royle » Mon Feb 15, 2021 2:56 pm

Ou local Landlord shouted at William Shakespeare to get out of his boozer.

He said “you’re Baird “

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 3538
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Mon Feb 15, 2021 3:58 pm

Went for a job at a Blacksmiths.
He said "Are you any good at shoeing horses?"
I said: "No but I told a donkey to sod off once!"

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 3538
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Mon Feb 15, 2021 4:00 pm

I just got an email saying I've won a free bungee jump no strings attached

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 3538
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Mon Feb 15, 2021 4:02 pm

I used to work in the packing department of a large butter manufacturers...but I was always losing my temper with my co workers.
The company are sending me on an Anchor Management Course.

Bob
Posts: 593
Joined: Sun Jul 23, 2017 10:58 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Bob » Mon Feb 15, 2021 4:29 pm

Old Bob wrote:
Wed Feb 10, 2021 9:52 pm
Shots1954 wrote:
Tue Feb 09, 2021 10:21 am
What do you call a man who can’t stand? Neil.
That was the first joke I ever heard, when I was aged about 6!
Blimey they did jokes 100 years ago 😊


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