Boom Boom

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Fuggletim
Posts: 527
Joined: Sat Jan 18, 2014 11:16 pm
Location: Whitehill
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Fuggletim » Thu Jul 09, 2020 5:01 pm

A Cabin Attendent approached a Pilot on a Transatlantic flight and tells him that he is concerned that there may be a case of "Human Trafficking" aboard.

The Pilot asked him to explain why? The Cabin Attendant says there is a pretty, but very confused and disorientated young woman with a Russian accent sitting next to an older, surly man who seems to have a limited grasp of English and they just look out of place together.

The Pilot sighed and said: "This is Airforce One, you know!"

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 3136
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Thu Jul 09, 2020 6:07 pm

Think I Just saw Elvis in the tool hire shop.
He was there to return a sander!

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 3136
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Fri Jul 10, 2020 7:54 am

BREAKING: Cadbury's have just delivered a giant chocolate bar to The Bank of England...

It's a massive Boost for the economy!

Giles
Posts: 137
Joined: Wed Jan 10, 2007 12:32 pm
Location: Farncombe
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Giles » Fri Jul 10, 2020 9:52 am

Dr Jim Royle wrote:
Wed Jul 08, 2020 2:40 pm
My mate Giles has a portrait of Diana Ross that he wants to hang above his door ....... but it is proving quite difficult to do, as "there aint no mounting high enough" ..
Looks like i started a chain reaction!

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 3136
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Fri Jul 10, 2020 10:09 am

My wife texted me earlier, "Why don't you ever put an x at the end of your texts?"

I replied, "Sorry Love"... Sharon

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 3136
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Fri Jul 10, 2020 10:10 am

Giles wrote:
Fri Jul 10, 2020 9:52 am
Dr Jim Royle wrote:
Wed Jul 08, 2020 2:40 pm
My mate Giles has a portrait of Diana Ross that he wants to hang above his door ....... but it is proving quite difficult to do, as "there aint no mounting high enough" ..
Looks like i started a chain reaction!
Where the attached link ? :D

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 3136
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Fri Jul 10, 2020 10:13 am

When I told my mum that I'd opened a theatre. She said, "Are you having me on?"

I said, "Well I'll give you an audition..... but I'm not promising you anything!"

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 3136
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Fri Jul 10, 2020 3:18 pm

I really love Spiderman's stand-up comedy. Did you know he makes all his jokes up on the fly?

Not my joke, I found it on the web

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 3136
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Fri Jul 10, 2020 3:32 pm

My new girlfriend got upset because she thinks that I don't like her cooking.

so to prove her wrong I had another slice of gravy.

Square Eyes
Posts: 7
Joined: Thu Jan 25, 2007 6:59 pm
Location: Specsavers
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Square Eyes » Fri Jul 10, 2020 4:52 pm

Anon E Mouse wrote:
Fri Jul 10, 2020 3:32 pm
My new girlfriend got upset because she thinks that I don't like her cooking.

so to prove her wrong I had another slice of gravy.
Blimey, that one appears on the last page of Mr Muddle (didn't he have something to do with Aldershot?).
Good to know you got through the whole book :wink:

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 3136
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Fri Jul 10, 2020 7:54 pm

Square Eyes wrote:
Fri Jul 10, 2020 4:52 pm
Anon E Mouse wrote:
Fri Jul 10, 2020 3:32 pm
My new girlfriend got upset because she thinks that I don't like her cooking.

so to prove her wrong I had another slice of gravy.
Blimey, that one appears on the last page of Mr Muddle (didn't he have something to do with Aldershot?).
Good to know you got through the whole book :wink:
I’m a bit old for the Mr Men books but glad it’s in there.
I get jokes from absolutely anywhere. Not fussy
Last edited by Anon E Mouse on Fri Jul 10, 2020 7:58 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 3136
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Fri Jul 10, 2020 7:57 pm

I hate people who use metaphors that are physically impossible.

They make my blood boil !!

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 3136
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Fri Jul 10, 2020 11:46 pm

Do you know how much it costs to hire a group of church singers?"

"You mean a choir"

"OK, do you know how much it costs to acquire a group of church singers?"

BillB
Posts: 273
Joined: Fri Jan 12, 2007 1:04 pm
Location: Herne Bay, Kent
Re: Boom Boom

Post by BillB » Sat Jul 11, 2020 9:41 am

probably a tenner

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 3136
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Sat Jul 11, 2020 12:35 pm

BillB wrote:
Sat Jul 11, 2020 9:41 am
probably a tenner
:lol:


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