Boom Boom

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Anon E Mouse
Posts: 1495
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Fri Jul 31, 2020 3:33 pm

What’s green and not very heavy?

Light green.

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 1495
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Fri Jul 31, 2020 3:34 pm

My wife wanted a puppy. But I didn't want a puppy. So after a good discussion we decided upon a compromise.

And got a puppy.

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 1495
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Fri Jul 31, 2020 3:34 pm

Any recommendations for somewhere that does tattoo’s while you wait ?

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 1495
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Fri Jul 31, 2020 3:35 pm

I've just been to see the meerkats at the zoo, How disappointing !!
They know nothing at all about markets or car insurance..

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 1495
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Fri Jul 31, 2020 3:36 pm

The patron saint of copying people in on an email is St Francis of a cc.

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 1495
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Fri Jul 31, 2020 9:29 pm

I had a goal to two lose stone by the end of the year.

Just three stone to go!

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 1495
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Fri Jul 31, 2020 9:30 pm

Auditioned for the position of trumpet player in my local jazz quartet today.

I thought I was going really well, but then I blew it.

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 1495
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Fri Jul 31, 2020 10:32 pm

I hurt my leg and couldn't get a physical appointment with the doctor, only an online one.

He found the problem, after half an hour, he sent me a knee mail!!

80fc
Posts: 101
Joined: Thu May 17, 2007 12:20 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by 80fc » Fri Jul 31, 2020 11:40 pm

Doesanybodyknowwhatthebaratthebottomofthekeyboardisfor

Disturbed Postie
Posts: 1078
Joined: Sat Mar 12, 2016 8:42 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Disturbed Postie » Fri Jul 31, 2020 11:44 pm

POSTIE, IF YOU’RE FINDING IT DIFFICULT TO POST COMMENTS WITHOUT THE USE OF OBSCENITIES THEN PLEASE REFRAIN FROM POSTING.

THANK YOU!

shots1965
Posts: 382
Joined: Sat Mar 30, 2013 8:16 pm
Location: Oklahoma USA
Re: Boom Boom

Post by shots1965 » Sat Aug 01, 2020 12:57 am

10000th joke
Well done me mouse



A couple of New Jersey hunters are out in the woods when one of them falls to the ground. He doesn’t seem to be breathing and his eyes have rolled back in his head. The other guy whips out his mobile phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps to the operator: “My friend is dead! What can I do?” The operator, in a soothing voice, says: “Just take it easy. I can help. First, let’s make sure he’s dead.” There is a silence, then a shot is heard. The guy’s voice comes back on the line. He says: “OK, now what?”

lanternhall
Posts: 999
Joined: Wed Jul 01, 2015 1:37 am
Re: Boom Boom

Post by lanternhall » Sat Aug 01, 2020 4:12 am

shots1965 wrote:
Sat Aug 01, 2020 12:57 am
10000th joke
Well done me mouse



A couple of New Jersey hunters are out in the woods when one of them falls to the ground. He doesn’t seem to be breathing and his eyes have rolled back in his head. The other guy whips out his mobile phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps to the operator: “My friend is dead! What can I do?” The operator, in a soothing voice, says: “Just take it easy. I can help. First, let’s make sure he’s dead.” There is a silence, then a shot is heard. The guy’s voice comes back on the line. He says: “OK, now what?”
Laughed out loud. Brilliant.

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 1495
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Sat Aug 01, 2020 8:16 am

Before the invention of crowbars, where did crows drink?

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 1495
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Sat Aug 01, 2020 8:17 am

I'm selling a limited edition bottle of Tippex.

It's a corrector's item.

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 1495
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Sat Aug 01, 2020 8:20 am

The oldest computer was owned by Adam and Eve. It was an Apple with very limited memory. Just 1 byte and everything crashed.


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