Boom Boom

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Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2666
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Sun Sep 13, 2020 8:18 am

I told my wife that I'm getting a map of Italy tattooed on my chest...

She said "You'll have sore Naples, don't be Sicily!"

WTF
Posts: 412
Joined: Sat Nov 03, 2018 9:17 am
Re: Boom Boom

Post by WTF » Sun Sep 13, 2020 8:49 am

I went to the doctors the other day with a cricket ball stuck up my bum.
He said how’s that?
I said don’t you start!!!

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2666
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Sun Sep 13, 2020 9:29 am

Heard a rumour of a giant butterfly in London. Probably just an urban moth.

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2666
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Sun Sep 13, 2020 9:29 am

A pyrotechnic expert friend of mine lost his job after the fireworks didn't go off in the right sequence. That's bang out of order.

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2666
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Sun Sep 13, 2020 9:31 am

What do you get if you cross Captain America with the Incredible Hulk? The Star Spangled Banner.

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2666
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Sun Sep 13, 2020 9:32 am

Why does Mr Potato Head have a mobile? In case Mr Onion Rings

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2666
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Sun Sep 13, 2020 9:33 am

I thought I saw a frog wearing a pair of shoes, but on closer inspection it turned out that they were open toad sandals...

WTF
Posts: 412
Joined: Sat Nov 03, 2018 9:17 am
Re: Boom Boom

Post by WTF » Sun Sep 13, 2020 9:47 am

I have just got myself two new dogs. Named them Rolex and Timex. They are Watch Dogs. Sadly they are full of ticks!

WTF
Posts: 412
Joined: Sat Nov 03, 2018 9:17 am
Re: Boom Boom

Post by WTF » Sun Sep 13, 2020 10:05 am

What is heavier water or butane?

Butane is as it's a lighter fluid!

Fuggletim
Posts: 383
Joined: Sat Jan 18, 2014 11:16 pm
Location: Whitehill
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Fuggletim » Sun Sep 13, 2020 10:24 am

Bought some "Seafood" themed shoes the other day. Each one has a sole and an eel.

WTF
Posts: 412
Joined: Sat Nov 03, 2018 9:17 am
Re: Boom Boom

Post by WTF » Sun Sep 13, 2020 10:32 am

Sun is out so I think I'll wax my car today. I have no idea how it gets so hairy!

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2666
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Sun Sep 13, 2020 12:07 pm

I start my new job as an apprentice bell ringer later this morning...

It's my first day, so they'll just be showing me the ropes.

WTF
Posts: 412
Joined: Sat Nov 03, 2018 9:17 am
Re: Boom Boom

Post by WTF » Sun Sep 13, 2020 1:21 pm

When Frogs car broke down he got Toad!

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2666
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Sun Sep 13, 2020 9:54 pm

As if my day couldn’t get any worse. My old clothes horse broke tonight...

It’s the end of an airer!

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2666
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Sun Sep 13, 2020 9:55 pm

Got my blood test results back from the doctor. Turns out I have correction fluid in my bloodstream.

I'm a Type-O


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