Boom Boom

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Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2677
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Sun Sep 13, 2020 9:56 pm

Friend of mine has been teaching me how to guess the weight of dogs.

I picked up a few pointers yesterday

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2677
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Sun Sep 13, 2020 9:57 pm

Just saw a chap in Homebase shouting abuse at cans of adhesive.

Must be awful to be glue tin intolerant

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2677
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Mon Sep 14, 2020 7:16 am

I didn't realise removing my doorbell
would have such a knock on effect.

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2677
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Mon Sep 14, 2020 7:17 am

My therapist said she wants to treat me with ygolohcysp.

But I told her reverse psychology doesn't work on me!

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2677
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Mon Sep 14, 2020 7:20 am

I've just arrived in Torquay and someone has pinched my "Smiths" cd from the car.

Devon knows I'm miserable now!

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2677
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Mon Sep 14, 2020 7:20 am

Last night I had a dream that I'd invented a new colour.

Sadly, it was a pigment of my imagination!!

Shots1954
Posts: 323
Joined: Wed Aug 09, 2017 6:31 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Shots1954 » Mon Sep 14, 2020 9:06 am

My wife says I'm a right old salt

It's always nice to receive a condiment

Shots1954
Posts: 323
Joined: Wed Aug 09, 2017 6:31 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Shots1954 » Mon Sep 14, 2020 9:35 am

I was waiting to pick up my luggage at the airport and discovered that everybody’s bags were damaged
Mine was really bad
In fact it was the worst case scenario...

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2677
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Mon Sep 14, 2020 12:31 pm

What did the fisherman say to the magician ?
Pick a cod any cod

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2677
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Mon Sep 14, 2020 12:32 pm

Why is Cinderella so bad at football ?
Because she keeps running away from the ball.

Calling the shots
Posts: 82
Joined: Thu Jul 09, 2020 9:46 am
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Calling the shots » Mon Sep 14, 2020 5:34 pm

An english cat and a french cat are having a race in a swimming pool.

The English cat is called one two three.
And the French cat is called un deux trois.

Who wins?
The English cat won because the un deux trois cat sank.

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2677
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Mon Sep 14, 2020 10:22 pm

I just found my first grey pubic hair!

Normally these things don’t bother me but it was in my Big Mac...

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2677
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Mon Sep 14, 2020 10:23 pm

Calling the shots wrote:
Mon Sep 14, 2020 5:34 pm
An english cat and a french cat are having a race in a swimming pool.

The English cat is called one two three.
And the French cat is called un deux trois.

Who wins?
The English cat won because the un deux trois cat sank.
Oldie but Goldie :lol:

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2677
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Mon Sep 14, 2020 10:24 pm

Today’s Maths problem:

If George is 68 and his girlfriend is 22, how much money does George have?

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 2677
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Mon Sep 14, 2020 10:24 pm

How old is All-Bran?

I’m just looking for the rough age.


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