Boom Boom

[WTF]

If 666 is evil, then technically 25.8069738 is the root of all evil...

[80fc]

It's three months until pancake day but the supermarkets are already selling eggs flour and milk

[Shots1954]

Who was the cheesiest band of the 70's?
The Brie Gees

[Shots1954]

What’s the cheesiest film of all time?

(Cheese) Graters of the Lost Ark?

[WTF]

Isn’t it just wrong that weight watchers website asks you to accept cookies?

[Fuggletim]

I bought a bottle of vinegar the other day and found it was full of lumps! Customer Services at Sainsbury's said it was a jar of pickled onions when I complained!

[Shots1954]

I am looking to buy a lighthouse.

Nothing flashy!

[Shots1954]

When I was a boy, my favorite teacher was Miss Turtle.
Funny name but she tortoise well.

[Shots1954]

There is no good reason for abbreviation to be such a long word

[Shots1954]

My dog just ate 7 scrabble tiles - the vet gave him an x-ray and said the next time he has a bowel movement it could spell trouble.......

[Shots1954]

Sat watching the rugby. The game was invented when, during a football match, William Webb Ellis picked up the ball and ran with it. Afterwards he asked the referee if he'd scored a goal. 'No' came the reply, 'but it was a good try'

[Fuggletim]

I went out for dinner once with the World Chess Champion. It was great, but because we had a checked tablecloth it took him 5 x hours to pass over the gravy boat!

[WTF]

A woman carrying a dog sits down on an airplane next to a man with a saw. She says “this is my emotional support animal, what’s that?”
He says, “it’s my coping saw.”

[WTF]

I took on an apprentice as a clock repairer. He didn't last 5 minutes, due to being too slow and dreadful time keeping!

[WTF]

The toilet has been stolen from the local police station. The police say they have nothing to go on....