Boom Boom

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Fuggletim
Posts: 703
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Location: Whitehill
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Fuggletim » Mon Apr 12, 2021 10:18 pm

My Grandfather always knew the Titanic would sink. He warned everyone several times, but was eventually asked to leave the Odeon.

Fuggletim
Posts: 703
Joined: Sat Jan 18, 2014 11:16 pm
Location: Whitehill
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Fuggletim » Wed Apr 14, 2021 9:34 pm

The CEO of Ikea has been elected as Swedish Prime Minister! He is hoping to have his Cabinet together soon!

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 4168
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Thu Apr 15, 2021 9:56 am

How do you get a pen across a lake? Biro-ing

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 4168
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Thu Apr 15, 2021 9:59 am

I wondered if Noah liked apples, then I realised he preferred pears.

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 4168
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Thu Apr 15, 2021 10:00 am

I've got a couple of friends who install blinds. Curt & Rod.

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 4168
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Thu Apr 15, 2021 10:01 am

Who is the saddest person in the pasta factory? The chap who’s filling cannelloni.

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 4168
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Thu Apr 15, 2021 10:18 am

Just read a survey stating that 75% of people are stupid. I'm feeling rather smug that I'm obviously in the other 40%!

Fuggletim
Posts: 703
Joined: Sat Jan 18, 2014 11:16 pm
Location: Whitehill
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Fuggletim » Fri Apr 16, 2021 7:25 pm

"Rabbit Stew" is on the menu at a local country pub one lunchtime. It hasn't been a bestseller, but a customers orders it eventually.

About 15 x minutes later the waiter brings it out and the customer starts to eat. After a few seconds the customer stops; coughs and calls the waiter over.

" What's wrong?" The Waiter asks?

"Well.." the customer says, "" I don't like to complain, but there is a hare in my stew...."

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 4168
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Sat Apr 17, 2021 10:45 am

I used to work at a cats home, but I had to leave, they reduced meowers...

Richard Petty
Posts: 958
Joined: Wed Jan 10, 2007 11:12 pm
Location: Farnborough
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Richard Petty » Sat Apr 17, 2021 11:24 am

Whoever stole my copy of Microsoft Office, I will hunt you down and I will make you pay... You have my Word!

Richard Petty
Posts: 958
Joined: Wed Jan 10, 2007 11:12 pm
Location: Farnborough
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Richard Petty » Sat Apr 17, 2021 11:27 am

Nobody ever asks how Coca-Cola is doing. It's always, "Is Pepsi okay?"

Richard Petty
Posts: 958
Joined: Wed Jan 10, 2007 11:12 pm
Location: Farnborough
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Richard Petty » Sat Apr 17, 2021 11:45 am

How do you know if someone is hitchhiking or just complimenting your driving?

Fuggletim
Posts: 703
Joined: Sat Jan 18, 2014 11:16 pm
Location: Whitehill
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Fuggletim » Sun Apr 18, 2021 12:49 pm

Before lockdown, I went to an "All you can eat" buffet at my local Indian restaurant. I really couldn't ask for more!

Anon E Mouse
Posts: 4168
Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 1:29 pm
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Anon E Mouse » Sun Apr 18, 2021 5:22 pm

If Benny and Bjorn out of ABBA had been called Steve and Dave, they would have been known as ASDA!

Fuggletim
Posts: 703
Joined: Sat Jan 18, 2014 11:16 pm
Location: Whitehill
Re: Boom Boom

Post by Fuggletim » Sun Apr 18, 2021 8:13 pm

Having insomnia has its good points! I mean it's only 3 x sleeps till Santa!


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